I have been quiet for a while due to being in hospital with Influenza B. It took a serious toll on my poor immune system, affected my kidneys and left me with little to no motivation. I thought the lack of motivation was due to depression. But I have come to find out that kidney function affects a great deal of behaviours in the brain and that my lack of will power or motivation is low because my kidneys are compromised from the disease.
It has also made it impossible for me to go back to work even part-time with the lovely folks at ART KNAPP Plantland.
I have been learning a lot. It’s not an easy thing to do, learning, when your whole body, brain included, is feeling tired, drained all the time.
I sit at home many days and “do” very little. I have people who try to motivate me some and usually I am very self motivated but even the things I really enjoy to do, take alot of effort and I don’t get very far when I am only functioning for a few minutes at a time. As a result most things take a long time to see any progress or don’t get done at all.
Which is very frustrating for me. As demonstrated in other posts on this blog, I have always worked and worked hard all my life. So much so, that I have only ever had 1 vacation (for 3 days in Disney World, many years ago).
Since I started the GO FUND ME https://www.gofundme.com/cyntht program, I’ve had a varied response. Some people are very supportive. Some people suggest I just want a vacation in Spain. I don’t find that particularly funny, since my life is on the line here and all the cancer clinics cost US$20,000 to $30,000 for treatment (and they don’t offer a good time). If I wanted a vacation I could go to Mexico on the cheap, I suppose, but that is not my focus. I’m just trying to survive.
When I started the Go Fund Me campaign I calculated the costs at that time (October 2015). Since then the Candian dollar has dropped significantly and costs have increased everywhere. So my original estimate of CAD$20,000 is actually closer to $25,000 and that is just for the treatment and air fare.
Meanwhile, since October, I have embraced as much of the Budwig protocol from home as possible. This results in a special toxin free diet of primarily organic foods, including lots of fresh fruits & veg, that can be made into juices and smoothies. Plus copious amounts of flax oil, colloidial silver, curcuma 100, magnolia oil, cannabis oil (pheonix tears) and other alternative treatments such as, acupunture. The wonderful folks from Purica have gifted me with Immune7, Recovery and Adrenal Support (mushroom therapy).
I have recently been advised to add milk thistle, mistletoe & frankincense to my regime. And I am researching further for things I can do from home. Other than the mushroom therapy, it all costs money.
I’ve used the donations already given for food and other treatments here at home, so I would still need the full CAD$20,000 to go to any cancer clinic. I am just hoping folks can continue to offer me something, as I cannot even continue what I am doing from home unless I continue to get help.
I have explained previously that any of the money I had saved from my working career, is now gone and I have incurred considerable debt on top of it. I am trying to live on a Disability Pension which gets topped up by Social Assistance. (CPP $760./month and SA adds $300./month) That’s all I have to work with and it is not enough to pay for my basic living requirements (rent, utilities, vehicle repairs/insurance, etc.).
I don’t think a lot of people realize that many treatments are not covered by our provincial medical plans. (It’s different in each province) The general assumption is that ALL our medical care is covered by Medical Services but that is not true with something like this disease. It is only partially covered. Some of the chemo drugs cost $2000 for one dose.
What is a person supposed to do when the best of the medical professionals in our system say they can offer nothing else to help you fight this disease. When they have prescribed the most aggressive treatment possible and it doesn’t work. Just lay down and die??? I am so tired of this fight that some days I feel that might be the easier choice.
Unless a large benefactor comes forward, I will not be going to any distant cancer clinics, anywhere. Right now most of the money I have received via donations, has been used towards treatment here at home and there is not enough to make the trip to the Budwig Cancer Clinic in Spain or any other clinic.
I am not winning this battle. My latest blood work shows only rapid growth of the cancer cells throughout my body. I am so full of cancer right now it is 6 times worse then when I was first diagnosed in March of 2014.
So my appeal for help continues. The Go Fund Me campaign will continue, although it is more practical if money is sent to me directly as the Go Fund Me takes 10% off the top of all donations.
Any funds can be sent in an Email Transfer to my email@example.com account. Please believe that every penny is being used and is very much appreciated.
The Messy Shepherdess